Monday.

The very whisper of the word strikes loathing, disdain, and a withering sense of dread into the mind of just about anyone. Why? Maybe it's because Monday sounds like the word mundane. Maybe it's because it's the start of a new work week. Or maybe it's because you didn't do your homework. Whatever the reason I'm sure we can all agree Monday has a lot of haters. 

My marvelous Monday started about by waking up to this:

Let's be honest, what post of mine wouldn't be complete without a adorable picture of Scout?

...and that may or may not be a suitcase that still needs unpacked. Don't even worry about it, because I'm obviously not. haha.  

5 Reasons why I don't hate Monday:

1. I am not a natural organizer or schedule follower (Example: The picture above). It's nice to be on a schedule. As much as I hate schedules sometimes, I know I need them. Hence why Mondays are my friend.

2. I can always remember watching Nick-at-Nite as a kid. You know, Munster Mondays, Lucy Tuesdays, Bewitched Wednesdays, etc etc. Munster Mondays was always my mom and I's favorite. So no matter what the memory of Monday's during my childhood is always good.

3. Mondays always means delicious food at my house. I usually make our biggest meal of the week on Mondays to pack for our lunches throughout the week. Today it's a roast with potatoes and carrots. The leftover options are endless!

4. Date night. What? On a Monday you say? Sadly Evan and I both have an aversion to crowds in general, therefore we have date night on Mondays. I challenge you, go out on a date on Monday, you will not regret it! You might have an entire restaurant or movie theatre to yourselves! Better yet, be able to hear each other when you talk! Not only do you not have to wait in line for anything, they might even be cheaper too. Even grocery shopping late on a Monday night can be considered a date (especially when paired with a DQ Mocha Chip Blizzard...but that's just me). Having a shopping cart race down an aisle with no one watching: priceless. Plus it makes us feel like the weekend was a little longer!

5. Ultimately we decide our attitude towards Monday, Tuesday, or whatever day we deem "bad." Last week for me = rough. But Monday let me start fresh. Today I wipe the slate clean and deem this Monday AWESOME.

Tonight is a quiet one at the Slee home.

Scout is sleeping on my feet, as usual.

Evan is back in his baby/man reloading room tinkering around with his things.

Please notice how elegant the combination of baby boarder and the cold metal steel of a man bench nicely come together.

Rub some dirt in it.

This week has been a rough one.

This week has been the week of learning that I hopelessly suck at a lot of things.

Realizing that you can't always be the greatest, toughest, strongest, or smartest all the time is a hard pill to swallow. Especially when God decides that you need several doses in one week.

It's humbling.

First,

It started off with a dream I had earlier this week.

Uncle Don and I were just hanging out, being our goofy selves. We decided at some point that it would be a great idea to break into a kid's indoor jungle gym and terrorize the kids. (This is all the better, since we really would do something like this in real life) After running around scaring the pants off 4 year olds, we collapsed to the ground from laughing so hard.

In that moment my dream was so incredibly real.

I can see Uncle Don's blue button up shirt. I could breathe the thick, sweaty air of the jungle gym. I could feel my side hurting from the unstoppable laughter. I can still see kids staring at us like we were half crazy.

...and then I woke up.

It was the most overpowering feeling of sadness that I think I've ever experienced. It's unexplainable.

 I keep forgetting that he isn't here. I guess my brain hasn't fully soaked it in yet. It feels like he must be on a long vacation, or that he had to work again over Christmas; He will make it next year. But all of that is a lie; He isn't coming. It was like getting the wind knocked out of me at random moments when it came to mind throughout this week. I guess because it felt so real...just made it hard to accept it wasn't.

Then,

Thursday was a hard day at work.

I won't go into much detail about it, but it's hard to know when to be firm, but also fair. Especially when working with special needs kids. Not to mention that I'm super self conscious when it comes to making sure that I'm being as fair as possible.

I'm always questioning myself on whether or not I did the absolute best I could in the situation at hand. I've been doing a lot of praying, and asking God for some much needed wisdom and patience.

Next,

I finally admitted to myself that I am awful, horribly awful, at keeping in touch with my old friends. The same cycle happens every time. I miss my friends so much, but I never want to "bother" them, so I don't call. When I don't call I feel guilty. The guilt makes me scared that they will be mad at me, and so I don't call. How stupid is that? Yeah, pretty stupid I know. Why do I always make myself learn things the hard way?

I'm making an effort to call, text, or skype one old friend a week from now on. Hold me to it!

This,

Is a picture of Scout just because hes so darn cute.

and This,

Is a picture of Scout's lamb's (stuffing) brains. He was proud of it.

Bravo on making my house a fuzzball mess Scout. Bravo.

Finally,

Being in the military is hard, but honestly I hate the pity card that some people play here. You knew what you were signing up for so don't cry about it. Military men, women, and their families are incredibly bless with great pay, benefits, and blah blah blah. Yes, they get deployed. Yes, it's hard. But for goodness sake my mother doesn't plaster her bumper with a collage of stickers solely dedicated to my dad's engineering job. You catch my drift right?

BUT I will say,

The emotional roller coaster that the Army throws at me has worn me down this week.

Evan's schedule literately changes every other day...I wish I was joking.

It just makes it hard planning...well...anything.

This makes me frustrated, therefore emotional. We all know how I love dealing with sappy, irrational girl feelings. Whatever girl emotions, you can't catch me! The only thing I can do about this is take a big dose of suck-it-up and be ok with knowing I can't do anything to change it anyway.

Isaiah 40:28-31

²⁸ Have you not known?

Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the LORD,
The Creator of the ends of the earth,
Neither faints nor is weary.
His understanding is unsearchable.
²⁹ He gives power to the weak,
And to those who have no might He increases strength.
³⁰ Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
And the young men shall utterly fall,
³¹ But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.