The Story of Us

OK, so if you don't hear from me over the next few days, its because I will be extremely busy getting packed up to leave for home this summer. You saw my to do list yesterday, its crazy. Today I added about 4 things I forgot to that list. Unfortunately I have about 1,000 things I want to blog about! It always happens this way! With Krysti visiting I actually had a fantastic week & weekend, with re-life, fun, girlie-time, which made for interesting things to blog about! And lets not forget about new news on Evan...I miss that guy! (High school girl voice) I did this because we're totally in love. 

1. What are your middle names?  Evan's middle name is Ross and mine is Leigh. (Meredith Leigh Slee...should we blame my mom or Evan for this?)
2. How long have you been together?  8 years...dang.
3. How long did you know each other before you started dating?  Probably about a year or so. We met when I was 14 and he was 16 at our church youth group. 
4. Who asked who out? We had been hanging out just as friends for awhile. But, Evan finally asked me to be his “offcial girlfriend” in his car.
5. How old are each of you? I'm 22 (23 in about a month) and he's 25.
6. Did you go to the same school? We went to different high schools, but both ended up at Asbury University for college
7. Are you from the same hometown? Yep. Kittanning PA, our parents live about 500 yards from each other.
8. Who is the smartest?  For sure Evan. I took an IQ test and sent him the link to take it. I scored a 108 (trying extremely hard) and Evan scored a 128 even though he said he “got bored” towards the end and just started picking bubbles...that's not annoying or anything.
9. Who majored in what?  I changed my major about 100 times Art, English, Education, History. While Evan majored in Bible Theology with a Communications minor.
10. Who is the most sensitive?  I don't think either one of us is sensitive at all really. Maybe I have my monthly moments every now and then, but for the most part we are bluntly straight forward to a fault. Feelings aren't our forte. 
11. Where is the furthest you have traveled as a couple?  Um...from our home in TN to PA...I will get my honeymoon one of these years!
12. Who has the worse temper?  I do for sure. I'm constantly letting my temper get the best of me by snapping at people when I'm angry. Evan is always cool, calm, and collected, if he ever did lose his temper I think he might slaughter people.
13. How many children do you want?  That's a great question.
14. Who does the cooking?  We both take turns cooking. Evan is naturally better at it than I am though.
15. Who is more social?  Haha that one is me for sure! I never shut-up while you usually have to pry words out of Evan at any occasion.
16. Who is the most stubborn?  We are both crazy stubborn, but pretty bending when it comes to each other. I believe my old nickname Evan used to call me was "Muley." He's just "A Slee"...they are all stubborn in that family!
17. Who wakes up earlier?  Evan. He's up at 4 every morning to go to work. I'm naturally a morning person though too...4 o'clock isn't morning though...that's nighttime in my book.  
18. Who is the neat freak?  Evan. Sometimes I joke with him that he's borderline OCD about things. I'm really working on that this year to save him from strife...and so he doesn't divorce me.
19. Where was your first date?  Um, we really didn't have a first date. We were always hanging out together before we were ever officially dating, so there was never a first “big date."
20. Who has the bigger family?  We're even. We both have 1 younger sibling and about the same amount to aunts/uncles/cousins.
21. Do you get flowers often?  Never. I only kill flowers. Evan knows the real way to my heart is through something that goes to my stomach.
22. How do you spend the holidays?  Pretty laid back with our families. Since our families are literately yards apart, it makes it easy to do holidays with both sides of the family on the same day. The downside is having to eat 3 Thanksgiving/Christmas/Easter dinners in one day...
23. Who is more jealous?  Neither one of us are the jealous type. 
24. How long did it take to get serious?  We were very serious from the start. Neither one of us were interested in dating someone for the fun of it. We both had the same mindset of only dating someone who you would consider marrying. 
25. Who eats more?  Sadly I use to out-eat Evan daily, but since I've mustered up some self-control he's the “big eater” on campus now. Neither one of us put crazy amounts of food away. 
26. What do you do for a living?  I wish I knew! Lately I've been thinking about the possibility of becoming a high school principal. Maybe a photographer? Who knows though.
27. Who does the laundry?  Both of us. We are pretty equal on all the house chores.
28. Who is better with the computer?  I'm a serial computer killer. I'll go with Evan on this one.
29. Who drives when you're together?  Always Evan. I'm a bad driver.
30. What is your song?  Oh gosh...don't judge...but “I Swear” by John Michael Montgumery. 

- Large dramatic exhale -

This is my last full week of work before I'm off for summer break. I can't believe its the end of the year already, but I'm more than excited to get out of this building for a few months. I now know why they give teachers off for the summer: children would die. This break is necessary to save lives. I wish I was joking. All those teachers you see in the news for hitting their students and thought were crazy? Well I beg to differ my friends. They were totally legit and completely justified. Ok I'm just joking, you should never hit a student, yada yada yada...unless they deserve it. Sarcasm is a real friend this week. I'll be headed home for awhile to visit with my family and then come back here to finish out my summer until school starts. So many things are going on in the next month its kind of unreal. I'm excited for it all! 

This past weekend was a lot of fun. Saturday my friend Kaylee, another Army wife, came up from Nashville to visit. We spent the day thrifting, (my awesome finds will be on here soon) then went to dinner and a movie. We saw The Five Year Engagement. I'm still tying to figure out how in the world the movie got a 63% on Rotten Tomatoes, because I thought it was super strange. Maybe I just didn't understand the type of humor in it. The whole time Kaylee and I just kept laughing awkwardly with confused looks on our faces, not being totally sure if something was funny, unexpected, or serious. Plus, I hate movies where it takes years for the characters to realize they are perfect for each other. Just friggin get married.

 I am really proud of myself; I've been keeping everything pretty tidy at my house. Now I know this might sound trivial to some, but for me this is like keeping Gollum from his precious. Please don't picture me as a main star in an episode of Hoarders. I'm clean; I'm not organized, but I'm slowly getting there. I've started with just focusing on the kitchen and living room area, then I can work up to my Kryptonite area...our bedroom. I have problems putting clothes away. This is all on top of puppy sitting I might add. Rudder, my friend's lab puppy, has been with Scout and I since Thursday. Lets just say I've got really good at cleaning carpets. He and Scout have had such a good time playing together though, its worth it. They are so cute when they play together, its entertaining enough in itself!

  

Evan will officially have Skype this deployment! They were trying to figure out a way to wire internet to their bunker/living area to have it. They needed a spool of internet cable; it just took them awhile to find some. Lord knows how you come across that in Afghanistan. I didn't ask, I was simply happy they got it all set up. I'm beyond excited that we will be able to see each other! He also received his mailing address, so the boxes can officially start being sent. He needed baby wipes and hand sanitizer, so I got those things, and then some to send him. I'll try to remember to take pictures the next time I make up a box, so I can show everyone what I pack to send him. This time around I packed his mail, some magazines, his favorite snacks, and a few other things that are going to be a surprise! 

I am the wife of an American Solider

OK, so I usually hate stupid, sappy, my life is harder than yours, excuses for military spouses that some (not all) use. I know that the majority of people aren't like this, but the few that are drive me up a wall. My friends can readily attest that my blood pressure goes through the roof over overly zealous, bumper sticker ridden cars with Army wives carrying camo purses, wearing dog tags, and always bellyaching about how hard life is. I feel like a jerk admitting this, but its true! Evan keeps pulling my leg about how hes going to sneak one of these examples (below) on to my car...I. would. die.

Bumper sticks like these set me off:

I think planning strategic ways to kill people, while trying to stay alive yourself, while living in a 3rd world country is a little tougher. 

Who loves a man in dirty ACUS? Um...nobody, especially not this girl! They are stinky and disgusting! My clothes are never washed together with any of Evans Army stuff. I'm tempted to wash a load with nothing in  it between washes to wash the washer for goodness sake! Even Evan won't wash his own regular clothes with his Army clothes...that's saying something! 

 No it's not, because you're still alive to drive your ridiculous car around. 

Lastly, my favorite. I wish you could have seen my face when I originally laid eyes on it. Not only is it inappropriate but who says that, let alone plasters it on the back of a car?!?!

 The "you're so much stronger than me" or "I could never be away from my husband that long like you" comments make me cringe. I know people are just trying to be supportive and thankful, I just have a hard time accepting it without feeling like people are feeling sorry for me. I need to change my attitude on this, because it probably just me making up crazy stuff in my mind. So here I go with a foot in the right direction. I stumbled across this the other day, and I have to admit it is a kinda cool poem. Look, I promise I'm not going to hang it in my house or anything. 

I am the wife of an American Soldier. 

I am a supporter of the United States Army - an encouragement for the protectors of the greatest nation on earth. 

Because I am proud of my husband and the  uniform that he wears, I will always act in ways creditable to him, the military service and the nation he is sworn to gaurd.

I am proud of my husband. I will do all that I can to protect and provide for my family in his absence. I will be loyal to myhusband and to the vows that we made as we entered the covenant of marriage.

I will do my full part to carry on the valuesand goals we have set apart for our family and I will continue to instruct our children in the same manner.

As a soldier's wife, I realize that I play a vital role in my husband's decision to become a member of a time-honored profession - that I am doing my share to keep alive the principles of freedom for which my country stands. No matter what situation I am in, I will never do anything, for pleasure, profit, or personal safety, which will disgrace my husband, his uniform or our country.

I will use every means I have to encourage my husband to be the best soldier that he can be.

I am proud of my husband, my country and its flag.

I will fly the flag and will always remember the sacrafices made by my husband and by generations of men and women that have served our beloved country. I will try to make my husband proud of the manner in which I accept his decision to defend my freedom andthe freedom of all American citizens -for I am the wife of an American soldier.

Every goodbye makes the next hello closer

The morning Evan had to leave was kind of surreal. The anticipation of him leaving was the real part that was bugging me. I hate him being away, but at the same time I knew the sooner we said "goodbye", the sooner we could just start this deployment thing and start counting down the days to "hello" again. We got all his packed bags in the car, and he gave Scout some loving to say bye.

We got to his unit meeting spot and did the usual standing around waiting, while the guys did the last minute packing up of things. I talked to a few other Army wives, who were about to embark on their very first deployment. We chatted about the usual things, but underneath I could see the worry, sadness, and dread of saying goodbye in their eyes. I absolutely hate that. I wish I could somehow know the exact thing to say or do to make it easier...but really is there anything you can say to comfort someone when their husband is deploying? They are all so brave and strong. I wanted to grab them all in a bear hug, let him bawl their eyes out, and scream about how horrible and stupid this all is. But we couldn't. We had to be strong for our guys. They don't want to leave either, so why make it harder on them? That's just what Army Wives do. They push smiles through tears, act steadily confident through shaking uncertainty, and do anything that their duty requires them to do. I've never been prouder to know these amazing women who stand behind their husbands through anything; its such a stirring feeling of honor to see.

This time I didn't have that hysterical feeling tightening around my chest like I did the last time I had to ship him off. Its a feeling of overwhelming sadness, worry, and panic crushing you all at the same time; add a dash of wanting to hurl your guts up and that's about the exact feeling of you'll have. Fun, right? I'll admit it was probably one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced in my life. The first deployment when I told him goodbye, I immediately ran to my car and cried until I was completely broken. I am happy to say that this time around, those feelings didn't happen. I think Evan and I both felt unnaturally peaceful and a little detached about it all. We knew what to expect, and how to deal with it. The time came where they had to board the bus to the plane. I gave Evan one last hug and kiss goodbye. I made sure to tell him to "Be safe" like I always do. He responded how to normally does, by telling me that "Be safe" doesn't control the situation, if something is going to happen, it's going to happen. Typical Evan, always blatantly honest. I told him to shut-up and that I just needed to say it. That made us laugh. He heaved his pack on and made his way towards the bus. Halfway to the bus and he turned and told me "I love you; see you soon buddy." With a wave and a step on to the bus he was gone. I slowly walked to my car, wishing I felt more. I felt guilty not feeling more perturbed about it all. I guess maybe its a good thing; this time I have a clearer mind to help the girls out.

The guys are in Afghanistan taking care of each other, while we do the same thing on the home front here. In situations like this, you quickly become like close family to people, who just a few months before, were complete strangers. The military really is a world of its own. In its own strange way, maybe that's why some of us stick around so long, even when there are so many things that undoubtedly suck about it. If you're in the military the moment you meet another Army wife, you can already relate to them on some level, because we already know exactly how each other feels without saying a word. "There is a special bond between soldiers created by the harsh realities of their service; a bond which is incomprehensible to the civilian world.  Like their men—Army wives have a bond all their own. (via)" 

WeekEND

Sorry for the absence, I've been trying to find creative ways to breathe out of my face. 

I've found that hot Whiskey combined with Mucinex is a top contender to accomplish this. Unfortunately, I haven't had as much as a sniffle all year, and now the one weekend Evan shipped off I've been dying a slow painful sinus death. Hopefully, I will be back tomorrow with details! (Not of my cold silly, of Evan deploying!)

Tick-Tock Tick-Tock

The big D-day is this weekend.

I was a bad Army wife already (no surprise there) and announced "the day" on Facebook, only to get reprimanded that we're not supposed to post dates. I felt like a little kid in trouble at school for not following "the code" that all Army wives are supposed to know. Its like getting detention in high school for not paying attention all over again. Whatever, if we're being honest with ourselves, the Army will probably change it another 4 times until then. And I know I'm totally right on the that one! 

Not to sound like a broken record here, but it doesn't really feel like its deployment time again. I better warm up to the idea pretty quickly, seeing as its happening like - this week. I'm also sorry that this week is like military week on the blog, but hey this whats going on around these parts. Believe me, I wish I could be writing about something completely different. Yesterday we sat around wondering what we should do all day. Story of our lives. We ended up just hanging out and talking, while I snapped pictures.

 ^^^
Loves being my model

After Evan became tried of being my model, we went to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things Evan needed before he leaves. I needed a few things for our Thanksgiving dinner we're having tomorrow. I figured since he wouldn't be home for Thanksgiving we needed to celebrate it now. Plus, who wouldn't want an excuse to have some delicious food before he leaves! I'm feeling a little blue at the thought of Evan leaving, but on the other hand, the sooner we get goodbye over with, the sooner we get to say hello again.

I'm personally ready for the hello already.

Sacrifices

Ask almost any proud American if our military makes sacrifices, and they will readily agree with you along with a "Bring our troops home, with a God Bless America" to boot. Let me preface what I'm about to say by stating this isn't a pity party or to make you feel guilty, I'm just being real here. Also I'm not trying to scare the poop out of those who are in the military, thinking about joining, or getting ready to deploy. There are so many positives that outweigh the negatives, its just a very unique job environment. The top 3 ways most civilians think soldiers make sacrifices would be: 

1. Soldiers are away from their families. - Even when soldiers aren't deployed they are away from their families a lot. Evan normally works a 10 hour day, sometimes its longer. On top of these long days, when they aren't deployed they are in schools and training which often take them away from home. The Army trumps family a lot.

2. Soldiers are in 3rd world countries fighting for our freedom. - Would you just love to vacation in the dirtiest, hottest, coldest, and most foreign place on earth where everyone is trying to kill you? I'm betting the answer is no. Well this is where they go. During the day it easily reaches 100 + degrees and then drops below freezing at night; try camping in those conditions. During the day (100+ degrees remember) they wear full gear on patrol, which easily weighs 80-100 pounds. There isn't a bus, they walk. Walking itself is dangerous. IEDs are a major problem, and probably cause the majority of deaths. One bad step and you're legless, or worse, dead. You don't have any personal space or privacy. Evan had an average of 1 (cold) shower a month last deployment. You get to eat the exact same meal of jello eggs for breakfast, an MRE for lunch, and some form of "steaks" for dinner, everyday for a year. Some vacation huh?

3. Soldiers don't make much money. - So we're not millionaires, but we aren't doing half bad compared to most people our age. I'm so proud of us that we live below our income, and are paying off debt like its nobody's business! I guess in retrospect to what these guys go through the pay isn't exactly awesome, but Evan doesn't do his job because of the big bucks. To sound totally cliche, he does it because of what it means to be an American solider.

All of the above are true, but in my mind these aren't necessarily the important ones. Every person that chooses to join the military knows all of those sacrifices before they sign on the dotted line. There are other sacrifices that most of the population don't realize. Heck I didn't even realize these things myself until after a full 1 1/2 years in the Army. The mental burden of being a soldier, as I see it, is the ultimate sacrifice.

I'm no psychologist, but I know soldiers are impacted forever in war. I was a history major, I've studied the stories without a cushie layer to soften the blow. I fully understand the reality of war. Evan and I were watching a documentary on the Korean War last week. As I sat on the couch, I watched with a weak heart as strong, tough vets were trying their hardest to not break down while being interviewed. They can tell their story, but no one else, except fellow soldiers understand what its like. Most of them admitted they hadn't told anyone the stories they were telling in their interviews. It was breaking my heart to watch these guys relive the absolute horror of war. My mind kept racing with a million devastating thoughts. I can't imagine using my (dead) best friend as a sand bag. I can't imagine coming face to face with another living person and then killing them. I can't imagine looking down realizing my legs have been blown off my body. I can't imagine seeing my friends slowly die of horrible, painful wounds. I can't imagine...Then I realized I had a person, my husband sitting beside me, who might have gone through these very unimaginable things. A veil of anguish and inadequacy fell over me.

You see, Evan doesn't talk about Afghanistan. He talks about what his job was there, the funny things - like huge rooms full of weed, but its just surface things. Hes not being fake or trying to hide anything, hes just not comfortable with talking about it, even to me. I don't ask because there are some things that are OK left unspoken. I don't expect him to want to talk with me about it. The only people who know what he went through are his guys. They already know without speaking. Those guys will always have an steadfast bond because of the life-changing experiences that they have gone through together. I know not a day goes by that he doesn't think about the guys that didn't come home. Why can five guys step over an IED, but the sixth set it off? The question of "Why did I survive?" is a constant pain of guilt and torment for any soldier of war. Not only are these men willing to die for their country, but they are willing to take on a silent, struggle daily that none of us can imagine, only to sleep with dreams full of nightmares. Questions that can never be answered and moments that can never be erased from their eyes, minds, and hearts.

Evan and thousands of others will forever live with the mental battle of being a soldier. The battle of living with the impact of war, the things they saw, did, and didn't do. It is so our children will never have to see war. So our babies will never have to wear 80+ pounds of gear through the desert, praying they don't step on an IED. That sacrifice is one that Evan is willing to carry. Hes carrying it for me, for you, and for the future generation of people. So the next time you want to thank a soldier for their sacrifices, know it isn't just being away from their families, being deployed, or not getting paid enough. I hope this gives you a little insight to truly know what the real sacrifices our soldiers make everyday. 

It's so easy to fall in love

I've mentioned Lisa a few times, so I figured it was time we put a face to the name.

Lisa is a fellow Army wife, and her husband Korey works with Evan. They are deploying together in a few weeks, which leaves Lisa and I together to make dinner, have puppy play dates, and shop until we drop. (We both have a weakness for clothes...we apologize to our husband's bank accounts ahead of time) She is super sweet, funny, and the girl knows what she wants. I feel like I've known Lisa and Korey since college, when in reality its been maybe 4 months. They are so down to earth, they make everyone around them feel like old friends. Even more importantly, they really love each other. In a strange way their relationship functions creepily similar to Evan and I's. This summer they will be married a year! We decided we should take some pictures before the guys leave, if I do say so myself, Korey and Lisa rocked it!

(Please click on the pictures to view them, they look 10x better that way)

Korey and Lisa made Evan and I dinner last night after we took pictures. All I can say is Korey is a grill master, because he made me the best burger I've had in a very long time. I'm all ready dreading saying goodbye from these guys!

Another Saturday Night

Our Saturday was the usual here. A lot of sleeping in occurred with fluffy stack of pancakes to follow.

Scout enjoy them too!

After breakfast we decided that we would head down to Nashville and check out the Opry Mall. It is located right beside Bass Pro Shop which makes it a prime location. (Drop your husband off at Bass Pro and you can shop without playing 20 questions before you purchase anything!) I'm just kidding, actually Evan is usually a pretty good shopper as long as I buy him a pretzel and slushie at some point. The original mall was flooded and they had to completely re-renovate the entire mall. It just opened back up a few weeks ago. We got there early, but it was still packed! The first store I walked into my eyes and this top connected; It was meant to be. I did the first thing I always do, look at the price tag. $200 stared back at me. I told Evan we should just leave this store now, because I didn't want to look around and have my heart broken. The mall itself is really nice, most of the stores are high end, but there are places like Forever 21 too. I might want to add that the Forever 21 was HUGE! I'm talking as big as a normal Wal-Mart. I was standing there trying to not look like I was from po-dunk town Pennsylvania, but I failed. I didn't even know where to start! It wasn't a bad problem to have.

A lot of the basic tops I have are either too big, or washed to ruins. I got these 2 v-necks at J. Crew for $14 each. I was also looking for jeans, but I had no luck in that department.

Delicate lace skirt from Banana Republic for $20. 

We got home and took a nap, because spending money takes it out of you. Made tacos for dinner and then let Scout being weird to entertain us. (We also bought pop with chips and dip...rebellious I know)

Something I never want to do again.

Is plan a wedding.

As wedding season is rapidly approaching all my newly engaged friends are planning weddings and getting married. The hype of wedding season is in full swing! Don't get me wrong, I love weddings, and I loved my wedding, I just don't want anything to do with the actual planning part. Just the show up, fun, cake-eating, dancing, and being in love part. Not that I really "planned" mine in the first place, but still. I really can't think of anything more stressful to do. On a scale of fun it ranked somewhere around...oh I don't know...slowly pulling my eyelashes off one by one. I'm sure there has to be another girl out there in the world who didn't find anything appealing about wedding planning. Are you out there?!?!

 Anyway Evan proposed at the end of March 2010. We didn't really know when we could get married. Being in the Army it makes things a lot more complicated and well...stupid. So for a few months I tried in vain to plan a wedding. At first I was pumped, I mean wedding planning is what every girl DREAMS about! We all know the running joke of girls having their "Pinterest Wedding" board filled before they even have a boyfriend. I had thought about getting married and planning a wedding for so long that it seemed easy. It seemed easy to choose centerpieces, dresses, and flowers on Pinterest or Etsy, but when it comes down to choosing the things for your actual wedding day -- that's when it gets tough. I quickly realized that 90% of the stuff they say you should care about -- I didn't.

via

Should the center pieces have roses or lilies? Should the bridesmaids wear heels or flats? Should Grandpa Joe sit with Aunt Betty or at Cousin Fred's table? Questions like this drove me up a wall. Do people really care about this kind of stuff? I wondered in disbelief. I kept wanting to scream "I don't care! Some else can pick!" But when it's your wedding, you have to care, and nobody wants to pick for you. 2 months of hypothetical planning later, I was done with this wedding nonsense. I was stressed out, overwhelmed, and withering on the ground licking my wedding wounds. I felt defeated. Millions of girls had planned a wedding, and had fun doing it! Why didn't I feel that way?

It boiled down to only a handful of things I cared about:

I wanted to be married in a church.

I wanted a dress.

I wanted a cake.

I wanted Evan there. (Kinda important)

That's it.

I broke down. I told my mom I'd be in Mexico, if you want to see me get married, buy a plane ticket. Needless to say she wasn't exactly thrilled. Luckily, things worked out a lot differently than any of us had planned. On a random Wednesday afternoon in June we decided to get married. No big deal, right? I might want to add that we also decided to get married that Saturday...as in 3 days later. I called my mom and innocently asked her if she had any plans on Saturday. Then I dropped the bomb and told her our scheme. She called me back several times asking if I was serious. After the initial shock, both of our families were on board with making this wedding happen. I told my mom to take the reins, and make the decisions, I trusted that she would make it awesome! (Just and FYI: My mom has excellent taste...think Martha Stewart on crack...not hard to picture) Before we knew it, we had a wedding ready for Saturday. I can't gush enough about how perfect it was, but it really was! There were a lot things that we went without, but what we had were the important things. 

If you don't want a big wedding, don't have one. If you don't want a white dress, have a pink one, If you don't want your annoying aunt there, invite her anyway. It's not worth creating hard feelings. If you want to go to the court house to tie the knot, track down the judge. Can't afford flaming desserts? Have a bonfire and roast marshmallows instead. Make your wedding yours, even if that means doing things a little differently. 

 The American dream of marriage has just become another excuse for a party or who can put on the best show. Marriage isn't something special anymore. Kim Kardashian got married as a publicity stunt to make money for goodness sake! How much more can you degrade marriage into a three ring circus? Society has peer pressured us into being more concerned about having the best of everything for our wedding day, because after all it's our one day! Rather than remembering it's more about the two people committing themselves to each other, fancy clothes or not. Whether you spent $2,000 or 200,000 in the end, the outcome will be the same: You're married. Nobody will remember what color of table cloths you had, flowers will be wilted and thrown away, the food will be eaten, the monogrammed napkins will be crumpled up, and your wedding dress will be hung in the back of a dark closet. (The next time you'll probably even look at your dress will be years later. You'll be brushing the dust off of it, as your daughter looks at you with horror about how ugly and ancient it looks.) So people, please save your money to pay off student loans, have it for a down payment on a house, or go on a once-in-a-lifetime honeymoon. Make your wedding special, have nice things, but don't lose sight of what a wedding is really about. Surround yourself with people who love you, make your vows special, and never ever let something as special as your wedding day become a money-pit pageant. 

Brain Fart

This week has been pretty uneventful thus far. I got a few project done, and I have the whole house clean for once, including laundry! Its been pretty quiet since its just Scout and I. Evan should be getting home early this afternoon today. I'm so excited for him to get home, but it also means we're down to weeks until he leaves for Afghanistan. This time around it doesn't really feel like hes leaving anytime soon. 

Also, I've had a hard time blogging this whole week.
I have a thousand things to talk about (as usual) but none of it is coming out right.
Everything I try to write ends up frazzled with all my thoughts running together. This means I have 24 drafts, but none of them are anywhere close to making any sense. Brain farts are the worst. 

The Art of Letting Things Rot

One of the projects I worked on while Evan was gone this week was a compost bin. I've been wanting to do this for awhile now, but just hadn't had the chance made it a priority. I started researching, and all of the compost bins you can buy are somewhat pricey for basically letting stuff rot inside of it. Luckily I came across this post on how to make a compost bin out of a garbage can. I didn't have a garbage can, but I did have an empty plastic bin that I figured would work just as well. 

 Evan drilled holes through the bottom, top, and sides of the bin for me to let air in; preventing the food from molding in a bad way. Some composting tables make this whole process look super complicated...when really, you are making dirt by letting it hang out. The trick is having a good carbon to nitrogen ratio. Brown things like cardboard, leaves, grass clippings, straw, sawdust, etc. is carbon. Coffee grounds, egg shells, weeds, and other food waste is the green, or nitrogen. Basically you want to have an even portion of both for good compost. I used a thin base of dirt as my first layer. Next, I layered shredded cardboard and newspaper. Then, added lettuce, onions, and leftover soup that was a day too old to eat. I lightly misted the whole thing with water, (enough to make it damp, but not wet) slapped the lid on, and set it on a few brinks hidden away along the side of the house. 

Mmmmmm.....compost!

Last night I cleaned out my fridge before grocery shopping and added more. It felt so much better putting old food to use, rather than throwing it away to be doomed to rot sitting in a pile of plastic somewhere. The only upkeep is to mix it every 3-6 weeks and make sure it stays damp. It wasn't hard at all, and took me a grand total of  maybe15 minutes. 

Instead of having to go buy soil to plant flowers, (like I just had to do 2 weeks ago) I'll have nutritious soil for free! That's already saving me about $5-10 per bag of potting soil I won't need. I can already tell our garbage is going to significantly decrease too. Since there is only 2 of us, we didn't have that much in the first place, but now it will be even less. I'm so pump that I finally did this, I can't believe I waited this long! If you want more information on composting, especially things you shouldn't compost check it out here.

25 Years Young

Happy Birthday to Evan!

My man is 25 today. 25!!! I seriously can't believe how fast time flies. I guess it is true that time flies when you're having fun. I'm so proud of all the amazing things Evan has accomplished in his short 25 years of life. This morning we slept in, drank coffee, and made egg bagel sandwiches for breakfast. He left today before lunch to drive home for Easter week. Hes going too see all his family before he deploys. Scout and I are staying here since I have to work Monday. It stinks since he just got back from Louisiana...I mean who said I should have a job anyway? Oh wait, I think it was those things called bills! haha Despite Evan taking a family hiatus, Scout and I have some plans to keep us busy. I'll update you later this week on those projects!

I congratulated Evan on having our car insurance come down since he was considered an old man now. He was actually pretty excited about it too and added: "Well, now that I got all the cool birthdays out of the way, the next birthday to look forward to is 65 when I can retire." Perfect, you only have 40 years to go! 

(I might or might not have ignored Thirfty Thursday on purpose....Sorry! I had no motivation to upload the pictures I took...It's coming soon I promise, I have some awesome clothes to show!)

Babies

Are a big deal.

Twice this week I've had really intense baby conversations. That's two more times than I would like, but here we are. No, I'm not pregnant, nor do I want to be pregnant anytime in the next 4+ years. I'm not a baby hater, I just don't love babies the way most girls do naturally. I like 1 or 2 certain kids; I don't love kids. Most children to me are obnoxious, dirty, and expensive.

If I don't like babies or want one, why in the world am I blogging about it?
Great question.
I'm not entirely sure either.

My first conversation was with Evan. You might assume that talking babies with my husband wouldn't be a huge deal. I mean, he kinda has to be a willing participant someday, right? Well think again. Evan is in the same anti-baby boat as I am. This was the first time we've seriously talked about it...ever. It wasn't a long talk, just around when we might want to start, and the 101 ways you can screw them up. Before we got married I might of casually asked "Hey you're ok with maybe having a few kids at some point?" and he probably grunted a "Sure, whatever." At that time that was good enough for me. But now, we're grown-ups all of a sudden. Everyone starts asking about having one from the moment after you say "I do." The minute you have a headache, craving, or pass on a glass of wine, every one of your family members eyes you suspiciously. Then, out of nowhere everyone and their mother with a dusty uterus are popping them out and lining them up like Easter eggs. Next you start to think "Should I be having kids?"

The second conversation was with a co-worker. She asked me if I thinking about having kids anytime soon. I managed to gag out a "No!" while I tried not to choke on my lunch. I was wondering if she secretly knew Evan and I had just talked about that same topic the night before. - Of course not, but it was still kind of creepy. Then we ended up talking about different baby names for the remainder of our lunch break, which is always a little fun to think about - I won't lie -.

I'm not sure why, but I can't stop thinking about it. Its not baby fever; its baby stress. Do people realize how big of a deal it is to have a child? Because I feel like these baby popper-outer's don't! A human alien child growing inside of you? Weird. Pooping out a baby. Ouch. Letting a baby suck on your boob. Awkward. Never having a solid 8 hours of sleep again? Suck.You are creating another functioning (or potentially non-functioning) member of society. I guess I'm not entirely sure of where I stand on babies, or how I feel about having them. Anytime I think about it my chest tightens and my face get crinkled. I manage to come up with completely ridiculous situations that could put me in a worry induced coma, over children who don't even exist yet. Am I completely alone with hysteria about my imaginary children? I'm not in any place right now to want a baby, and that's OK. Yeah I think about it, talk to Evan about it, but I don't have the fever yet. If it takes until I'm 40, that's OK too. I'm not feeling rushed or pressured. If I even decide to have a kid or two, which I might decide to pass, it's going to be when I'm not completely possessed with apprehension. I want to be wrapped up in excitement, love, and peace.

I'm still a little confused as to why this is all going through my head...maybe its just a girl thing that we all go through at some point. Like I told my Mom a while back, if it ends up just being Scout, Evan, and little old Me, I'll take just that. I've never been happier in my life than I am now in this moment. I'm perfectly content with my life and all the amazing people in it. So, for now, I'll keep it just like that.

We shan't ever fight again!

It's amazing what 3 weeks apart will do to a couple. 

All of a sudden you're in googly-eyed love again. That sweet little face has never done a thing to annoy you! (That you're dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin chemically surged brain seems to remember.) Evan and I love each other very much, but sometimes love doesn't stop you from wanting to slap your spouse silly when they get on your last nerve. We are pretty extreme opposites, which can make it easy to find things to fight about. Understanding how the other person solves problems and communicates is another trip wire that's against us too. I usually irately yell and scream my opinion and then shut down when the other person (namely Evan) doesn't immediately agree with me -- I don't want to talk, be touched, or be in a room with another breathing human being. Evan on the other hand, wants to talk in a calm voice, in close proximity, and then hug it out. Yeah, try working that one out. The longer we're together the better we're getting at "fighting."

 Time apart does things certain things to you though. It blotches out the dark spots and makes the sweet, silver lining shine brighter. It makes you remember why you love that person for exactly who they are. In some berserk way it makes you miss the very things that drive you up a wall when they are normally around. But I guess that's what loving someone is all about; loving the good and bad. By the end of Evan's training trip he was a little exasperated. "I'm more than ready to see you. I realized these last three weeks that you are the only thing that keeps me sane and not an extremely angry person." he said in a text. When he came home he immediately gave me a big hug and exclaimed with charm "I love you so much I never want to fight with you again!" I was thinking more like "Awww that's sweet but let's not hold our breath because we both know that's completely crazy and will never happen." with a big hug and smile in return.

Little did I know Evan was 100% serious when he expressed his undying, no fighting love for me. I mean does anyone really enjoy fighting with anyone that they care about? We decided together, that when we became angry we have to immediately make-out, then if we're still mad we could fight. Well it turns out this method has worked pretty great for us. It probably sounds completely ridiculous or ew, mom-and-dad-making-out to some of you, but tough cookies people! Do you want us to stay in love or not?? If one of us starts to get the angry, you'll hear from the other one in a really curious tone, paired with a clever, witty smile: "So, are you saying you're mad?" hinting at the obvious. The next thing you know, we both end up trying to suppress a smiles from creeping over our faces, and then eventually bust out laughing, along with a little pecking. 

Taking a time-out to make-out forces you to laugh, which makes being angry seem not as important. Even if you still are mad you are able to sanely and politely talk about what's bothering you like grown ups. It makes fixing problems fun instead of daunting. I'm realizing when I'm being completely irrational and unreasonable about something meaningless...most of the time I'm not even mad at Evan but it somehow always gets directed towards something boringly stupid he did (or didn't do). I put myself in time out and don't let myself take my frustrations out on my innocent husband. I can honestly say we haven't fought once since he's been home from training! So, maybe some of you might need to take a time-out to make-out. I'm never mad when I have too!

The Return of the Kirby Man

Tonight the doorbell rang...again.

I swear the city must pay people to come ring doorbells to sell stuff or ask for money in this neighborhood. Evan answered the door and stepped outside before I could see exactly who it was. As you all know Evan is a s-u-c-k-e-r for sales people. (aka hes a really nice guy who just can't say no) I peeked out the window and it was a Kirby man. For those of you who might not know, Kirby men and I have a...special relationship. I immediately felt my blood pressure rise as I swung the front door open, and swiftly closed it behind me. Evan already had a bottle of free carpet cleaner in his hand and the guy had the box lugging it up the front steps. I braced myself in front of our door and politely said our Kirby friends were already here, I had the 3 hour demo, and that I wasn't interested. Then he started..."Well if I do 3 demos I get reimbursed for gas and my time" yada yada yada...I firmly said no thanks. The sob stories kept coming, along with the no's from me.

"I don't mean to beat a dead horse here but -- " 

I cut him off and said in a irritated, flat tone "But you are."

Evan looked a little surprised, and the Kirby man left with his boxes. 

"Meredith, that was kind of harsh." Evan said after we were back inside our "dirty" carpeted house.

Maybe it was harsh, but hell will freeze over before I buy a sweeper from Kirby. Either way I kept my evening, sanity, and dirty carpets! 

FYI: 30 minutes later two guys came around asking for donations for helping inner city people make better life choices. (No offense to inner city people, but can't I get a donation for making wise life choices and for not ending up a loser?? I'm just saying...) They left with a $25 donation from us...Oh Evan. I guess it's a good thing one of us isn't heartless to all the people who come to our door! 

Husbands are distracting

Hence why I've been absent, like, all of last week. Evan finally arrived home from Louisiana from training before he deploys! Thursday night I showered and got all prettied up to pick him up at 11 o'clock at night. Only in the military world do you do this kind of junk. Friday I made sure I had one of his favorite meals ready: cheeseburger pizza. Ultra healthy, I know. This time I had a new pizza dough to try.

Please try this pizza dough recipe! I'm begging you! For the last year and a half or so, I've tried dozens of different pizza dough recipes. Most of them claiming to be "amazing." But, I couldn't find one that made the bubbly, chewy crust that also has texture and crisp. Some have been easy, others a little trickier, but this one is by far the easiest and tastiest dough I've ever had. It seriously rivals most pizzeria's that I know. Which is saying something if I can make it and it turns out phenomenal!  

Basically you mix water, flour, salt, and yeast together and let it sit for 18 hours. Its seriously that easy. I found it in the bon appetite magazine I get in the mail. You can find it online here.

 Over our long weekend (I was off for spring break!) we ate a ton of food, watched movies, and sat on our bums together all weekend; it was awesome. We were just happy to see each other and talk. One thing we decided this weekend, was that Harrisonburg, VA would be an awesome place to retire and buy a farm. (We have never been there...but whose to say it wouldn't be awesome!) 4 hours from the beach, 4 hours from Washington D.C., and 4 hours away from family. It's kind of perfect. The countryside is gorgeous, and it has such a large historical background that makes it even better! (Think Williamsburg, Richmond, and D.C.) The link is for a somewhat negative review of the place, but honestly for us all the negatives are the main positives in our eyes! We're just dreaming here; I'm crossing my fingers for someday.

Not all of us are happy Evan is home though.

When Evan arrived home from Louisiana Scout was pumped...at first. Well, that is, after he woke up and realized what was going on. Now, he's decided that Evan being home isn't so great. He might have a tad bit of jealousy in his bones. Whenever we came home yesterday from the range he was thrilled to see me, then Evan walked through the door after parking the car. He immediately stopped looked at Evan, and then looked at me disgusted. Everytime Evan tries to sit on the couch beside me Scout:

 a) decides he has to pee, so one of us has to get up
b) barks and cries at Evan until he moves, or
c) tries to smash his body on the couch between us

He's such a mama's boy.

One more thing. Evan's birthday is this Saturday and I have 0 ideas of what to do. Any suggestions?

Thrifty Thursday

I almost forgot today was Thrifty Thursday!

For the first month we were married in our new house, this was our only lamp. I guess lamps are one of those things I never think about when buying the basics for a room. But, they are one of the most important things! They make a room homey, soft, and cozy.

 I found this lamp in a second hand store for $7! Can you believe it? I haven't painted it or anything! I did however, replace the lampshade. The original lampshade was an awful brown-poop color, which kinda made you want to puke just looking at it. I found the lampshade you see here at Goodwill for 50cents. 

When looking for used lamps, look at the shape of the lamp, not the condition. Luckily as I said before, I didn't have to paint this one, but as long as it has nice "curves" spray painting it is always a great option. I recently bought an old brass lamp that is god-awful ugly, but the shape of the curves are beautiful. I'm leaning towards painting it a minty green to put in my spare bedroom. Also, you can easily re-write any lamp with kits you can buy at Wal-mart. 

Scout is thrifty because he was free...and adorable.