Tuesday, April 3, 2012

It's my pity party and I'll whine if I want too!

* Detest is the current vocabulary for my feelings towards the Army this week. I hate Evan's long hours. Last night he didn't get home until 6:30 p.m. (he left the house at 4:45 a.m.). I hate it that he has to deploy again so soon. I hate the stupid suck-ups and people who play mind-games. I hate Army bumper stickers.

* I want a vacation. For a week. With my husband. Is that really too much to ask? I was looking at people's spring break vacations on Facebook and became genuinely upset and envious, to the point where I realized I was breathing with my teeth gritted. Can someone please plan me a secret vacation, work it out with my boss, and hand me plane tickets. Please and thanks.

* There is a retarded bird that keeps flying into my windows because it's seeing it's own reflection. Now we live in a cave with our blinds and curtains shut. It's pooped all over my porch, and my table and chairs, and it's asking for me to kill it. A BB gun being in this bird's future is a real possibility.

* Spring break was awesome, now at work I feel like I'm dying in prison. It's great.

* I'm going through a quarter-life crisis. Why can't I know what I want to do? Why can't I be amazingly good at one specific thing so it's painfully obvious what I should do. Why can't I have some confidence in this department? Why do I have to be a stupid girl and have potentially ugly or disappointing babies, therefore ruining my career timeline.

* There isn't any food in my house. Instead, I stand around opening cupboards after work waiting for food to appear, or, morph into an Iron Chief and be able to make a fantastic meal with random, distant ingredients.

* The wedges I've had my eye on have not come back in stock, but are discontinued all together.

Sometimes its really, really, really, hard to be thankful for all of the positive things in life. It sounds stupid, I know. Clean food, excellent health, and a warm home are the basic things I take for granted everyday. I know I should be happy with these simple things, but sometimes I think it is a big deal that my summer shoes aren't in stock, or there is bird poop all over my porch, or that I feel so out of control and unhappy with my job. Sometimes I want to whine, throw a fit, and pout to have everyone feel bad for me. So here I sit with a crumpled face, pouty lips, and negative attitude. Just leave this little Meredith in the corner for awhile until she's done with her tantrum and I'm sure she will eventually be just fine. 

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